This week has been filled with emotions all around the globe. For me, my week started out losing my boyfriend of 10 years father to a very quick and sudden illness. That same day Kate Spade passed, I also learned of the passing of an elementary school classmate. Today we lost Anthony Bourdain. These deaths, especially the heavier ones have had me evaluating the storms from my past that took me down rocky tides that at times left me feeling helpless. They all began in my teens and got worse when my dad died. Thankfully, I had the support that I needed and more. My choices of therapy haven’t been mainstream, but they’ve taken me out of the rocky tides and into calmer waters. Truth is I am filled with so much water. I ebb and flow like the ocean. I feel my pains and let them heal. I once had an ache in my body that came out of nowhere. It lasted 6 months. It finally went away after I stated out loud to the universe ‘you’ve got to feel it to heal it.’ Literally, within a week of me stating that to the universe, my physical pain was gone. It’s never returned. I am convinced it’s because I finally gave myself permission to feel. To let my emotions move through me rather than let them stay dormant.
I’ve got countless stories of my own past struggles with depression and anxiety. I have been reflecting on some of them and hope to someday write them to share. And to share because I’m no longer ashamed to admit that I’ve been broken into pieces many times in my life. I’m open to someday share them in hopes they will inspire others to receive the help that I got.
Let’s let each other talk when needed. Don’t get annoyed if you think someone talks too much or has a story to share.
If someone needs to just talk, hold space for them. Don’t judge.
Some people don’t open up only because they feel misunderstood and Sometimes people need someone to sit by them to just cry. None of us fully have our stuff together. It’s just that some of us can hide it better.
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
Help is just a phone call